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ctfd September 15, 2009

Posted by That Guy in Abbreviation, Definition.
Tags: , , , , ,

Calm The Fuck Down

A little of this may help you CTFD. (CC-licensed photo by Ingorrr)

A little of this may help you CTFD. (CC-licensed photo by Ingorrr)

Yesterday morning I was sitting at my desk, minding my own business, when I got an e-mail sent to three VPs, two middle managers, me, and one of the other programmers. It was a semi-frantic missive from one of our marketing specialists wondering why a promotion we were doing wasn’t on our home page.

I had a few reasons that I did not enumerate to her.

  1. You asked me to do something like this about two weeks ago. We discussed it and came to the conclusion that making it appear as a postage-stamp icon would be fine. So I did that.
  2. I’m not responsible for the other promotional box you saw, the one that made you remember about the postage-stamp I already did for you. So I reminded you. Except now that’s not good enough, somehow.
  3. You never follow up on anything.
  4. We have a vanity URL to go to that promotion — and it’s your fault that it’s not in any of our advertising. We’ve only been using the same vanity URL for three years; no reason to start promoting it now, right?
  5. People don’t see graphical buttons on the internet. They treat them as ads and ignore them. You refuse to listen to me on this.

Instead of bringing all that up, I increased the size of the postage stamp a bit.

Right after I did that, the Two-Year-Old, naturally copied on this message because the marketing specialist mistakenly assumed she was involved in anything web-related that makes any sense at all, came storming out of her office and asked one of the other programmers to change the promotional priority on the site. Just went ahead and made a sweeping change without consulting anyone who might be involved in the other promotional offerings on our site — which may be making us more money — because you saw a problem you could quickly foist off on someone else.

You — and everyone else involved in this debacle, including me — need to CTFD.

According to a contributor to Rules of Thumb:

The urge to fix up a house you’ve just moved into is strongest during the first 30 days. To save money, wait for a month before you do any repairs.

It’s the same with making changes to any project: don’t immediately change stuff. Calm down (calm the fuck down, if you will), take a breath, think about what you want to do, and then ask politely. If your web developers and designers are lucky, the change will get so bogged down in committee that it’ll never be made. But overreacting never made anything better, and I think we’ll learn that as time passes.

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1. shortly after I return « corporatespeak - September 17, 2009

[…] and we never will, because we never will receive the software package”, and everyone will ctfd and go back to their […]

2. Sonographer - November 25, 2011

I don’t disagree with this blog!!!

3. agen sbobet - December 15, 2011

You couldnt be more right on!!!

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